I am here to post.

To say that I wish I were never born.
Never existed.
I wish I were dead. Or non-existent.
I wish I wasn't a girl.
I wish I wasn't human.
I wish I wasn't a Chua.
I wish the stupid birthing process had failed.
I wish I had died at birth. Then perhaps I would still get occasional visits with flowers and people would clean my grave and smile and talk to me nicely.
I wish alot of things. But I guess it will not happen.
I am surrounded by people, who think what they do is right, their reasons justifiable, giving a load of crap, and believing that it entitles them to whatever they want to believe.
I hate those people.
I hate myself.
I hate life.
Life's unfair yes.
Many have complained that.
Many say suck it up.
Live with it.
But what does one do.
When their world crumbles.
Can they truly suck it up.
And live with it.
I wish death imminent upon me.
A gas leak?
Light fixtures loosens?
Something.
I'm a coward.
I don't dare to kill myself.
What does one do.
When they want to die and be nonexistent badly.
Yet they are too cowardly to kill themselves?
Hahaha.
Caught ya did'nt I?
Did I sound suicidal?
Just testing all of you.
Can you guess what I have typed is fake?
Or is it all really the truth.
I am writing this post.
With tears streaming down nonstop.
Goodbye I wish to say.
But will I come back again?
Maybe. Probably. Most likely.
Because I am a coward.
Anyway, gotta go.
There is school tomorrow.
This was a pretty sad and long post.
I hope you don't take it to heart.
Now this is truly, Goodbye............but i will probably be back...

Crying...